Thursday, January 17, 2013

The Bachelor Sean - 2013 - Week 2

It’s Week 2 of The Bachelor….let the poop storm begin!

[Cue gratuitous Sean-in-the-shower scene.]

As you know, we are counting some of the ridiculous phrases that always abound on these shows.  At the end of last week, the word “journey” was used again, so that’s 4 times total for Week 1.  At the beginning of this episode, Sean says it again, so now we’re up to 5.  “Putting myself/yourself out there” has only been uttered once.  Give ‘em time.  This is one of their favorite phrases on this show.

One-On-One Date

The first one-on-one date of the season went to Sarah.  Sean arrived to pick her up in a helicopter, and all of the other girls gasped with amazement.  What?  A helicopter?  OMG!  Seriously, have these girls never seen this show before?  

Anyway, Sarah looked lovely for the date.  Her eyes looked amazing.  Kudos to whoever did her makeup.  Sarah and Sean ride around L.A. in the chopper, and then land on top of a really tall building.  (I'm smelling an adventure date.  How 'bout you?)  He tells her that they are going to free-fall 300 feet to get to a champagne toast down below them, because, apparently, this skyscraper does not have an elevator or stairs.....weird, huh?  But they are going to do it togetherrrrr, because Sarah trusts Sean after knowing him for 2 whole hours!  

[One day, someone is going to get seriously hurt or dead on this show doing one of these ridiculous stunts.  Then we're going to have to sit through an entire Bachelor-themed memorial service while people tell us that ______ always "put herself out there" and died while experiencing this amazing "journey," blah blah blah.]

Well, they made it through the jump okay, so no sappy memorial this week.  For the evening portion of the date, Sarah changed into a sexy black dress, which looked fabulous on her.  She told Sean a story about when she tried to go zip-lining with her dad.  They filled out the paperwork and even got strapped in, when an employee came up and told her that she couldn't zip-line because of a state law prohibiting people with physical disabilities from participating.  It really upset her that someone told her that she couldn't do something she really wanted to do.  So she was thrilled that Sean took her on an adventure date and didn't patronize her.

They talked some more, and then Sean gave Sarah a rose and a kiss.  The kiss was about a 5 on the Opto-Mom hotness scale.

Group Date

The group date consisted of these lovely ladies:

I know these girls were ready for some fun and bonding with each other, and were totally prepared to take turns spending time with Sean.  Bahahaha!  Okay, I'm totally kidding.  It was catfight central, as usual.

They met Sean at a big mansion, and were told that they were doing a romance shoot for Harlequin Romance.  AND.....the girl with the hottest scene with Sean would have their photos featured on three Harlequin novel covers.  So, immediately, Supahmodel Kristy begins telling everyone who would listen that she's a professional at this, and she would be winning.  Tierra got on everyone's nerves with her possessiveness.

All of the girls seemed to have fun with their own shoots with Sean, and, of course, got jealous of the other girls when they were shooting.  Lesley M. and Sean did a cowboy scene, and they looked genuinely hot for each other, and even shared a gentle kiss.  Supahmodel Kristy, however, decided to go all attack-y during her scene, and she was pulling on Sean and smushing her breasts into him.  They did come across pretty steamy on film, and Supah ended up winning the 3-cover deal.  She was VERY excited about the cover deal, but didn't really mention Sean, just that SHE was the winner!  Gee...narcissistic much?  I think she's just there to further her career.

During the evening part of the date, Sean reassured Kacie that he does want to explore the possibility of a romantic relationship between them. 

He and Lesley ended up kissing.  The first kiss was a little bland (about a 4), but Sean loosened up and their second kiss was closer to a 6.5.  

Tierra was pouty and wouldn't sit by the other girls, even though they asked her to come sit with them.  Sean had a talk with her and told her that he understood how she was feeling.  He really gets kind of a goofy look on his face when he's talking to Tierra.  I think she'll be around for a while unless she lets her psycho flag fly too early and freaks Sean out.

Katie showed her apprehension and discomfort with the whole Bachelor scene, and told Sean that she wanted to go home.

Sean ended up giving the rose to Kacie, and, while all of the other girls were disappointed, Tierra was madder than a wet hen.  Guess she's just going to have to learn to suck it up if she wants to be there for the long haul.

One-On-One Date

The next lucky lady to get an individual date was Desiree.

Sean decided he wanted to test Desiree's sense of humor by pulling a little prank on her.  The Bachelor people set up a fake art gallery, and one of the most "expensive" pieces was set to break while Desiree was in that room alone.  This would make her think that she had broken it, hence the prank.

[Side note:  Des looked smokin' in her little black dress that she wore to the "gallery."]

So, Sean and Desiree were offered the chance to look at one of the artist's most expensive works in the back room.  One of the producers interrupted and pulled Sean away for an interview, leaving Des alone in the room with the art.  BUT, Sean was actually in the next room watching on a hidden camera.

Golly, a hidden camera.  I hope she doesn't dig her underwear out of her butt or pick her nose or something.

Desiree was sitting quietly, when the piece of art just crashed to the ground and shattered!  She walked to the door to get someone, and the artist came in and was visibly upset about the ruination of his "priceless" work of art.  Poor Des!

Sean decided to stop being a big meanie, and went in to tell the sweet girl that it was all a joke.  She laughed and was an excellent sport about the whole thing, which is exactly what I think he was looking for.

They went back to Sean's place for dinner and discussed their families.  Their family and parents were very similar, which seemed to deepen Sean and Des's comfort and bond with each other.  

The couple put their swimsuits on and sat in the hot tub, where he gave her the date rose.  Then they made out a lot, and it was the hottest so far, an 8 on the Opto-Mom hotness scale.

Rose Ceremony

Hey!  Do you remember Lindsay, the drunken, bachelor-molesting bride from last week?  She told Sean that her dad is an Army general.  Whoa!  They had a great conversation, and I think Lindsay is off the bubble for now.

Amanda turned into Little Miss Pouty Pants because she hadn't gotten to talk to Sean yet, or maybe because somebody peed in her champagne.  I don't know, but she was glaring at people and rolling her eyes, and looking really pissy.  Plus she was wearing a neon yellow top with big roses on the shoulders.  All of this together made her resemble a terroristic pinata.  It was really quite creepy.  Later, when Sean came to speak with her, she turned into Little Miss Freakin' Sunshine, laughing and giggling!  This gal's gotta be bipolar, or something.

Robyn was concerned with how race would play into Sean's decision, and he told her that he's dated girls of many races, including Black, Hispanic, and Persian.  He was totally comfortable with the question, and he and Robyn had a little moment there.

Already safe going into the ceremony are:  Sarah, Kacie, and Desiree, because they received the date roses.  And remember that Katie left during the group date.

Receiving roses during the Rose Ceremony were:  AshLee, Lindsay, Robyn, Jackie, Lesley M., Selma, Catherine, Kristy, Leslie H., Tierra, Taryn, Daniella, and Bipolar Amanda (WHAT?!?).

So, leaving the mansion in Week 2 were Brooke and Diana.  In her interview, Diana said that she had really put herself out there.  Told ya it was coming, people!  I told ya.

Journey count:  5
Putting self out there count:  2

No comments:

Post a Comment